Two Sides Of A Coin, By Emeka Monye

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Earlier this week, I read a piece by one Sunny Igboanugo faulting Nigeria’s football international, Victor Oshimhen after the latter reacted to how one of his childhood friends failed to show appreciation for a financial assistance of five thousand United Kingdom pounds.

Part of the statement reads: “Victor Osimhen: “I used to send money to one of my childhood friends but one day he told me about a business he wants to start and needed financial support. I sent him €5k but he didn’t appreciate it and even told me he read on the news that I earned 1 million euros every week and he was expecting like €50k to start up this business. I was so mad that I wanted to reverse the transaction but I couldn’t. That money €5k can only buy a pair of shoes in Europe but in Nigeria, it’s a lot of money. Nobody sent me 1 dollar before I came to Europe, I hustle day and night, I sold bottled water on the street. People should learn to appreciate whatever they get as gifts not have this sense of entitlement “. Off quote.

Osimhen, in his statement, had complained how ungrateful his supposed childhood friend was after the transfer of such a huge sum, by Nigeria standard, to his account, describing such an act as unbearing and unbecoming. He went in to narrate how he sold bottled water on the streets to etch a living for himself, yet not a few people will identify with such struggles.

There are many Osimhens on the streets, struggling day and night to break the clouds of poverty and let the rains of wealth shower upon them, yet most of these people who feel entitled, will never see them but when the sunshine of wealth begins to smile on them, they surface from nowhere, claiming entitlement. That’s the reality and it is stark.

Osimhen, to me personally, has done well with his generosity. He owes no one an explanation about how he spends his funds since he works for it and therefore can decide how he spends it, to whom he wants to give it and how much he desires release for his generosity to individuals and charity organisations.

For God’s sake, people who are quick to thinking that those who have made it financially are obligated to assist them, should begin to have a rethink, they should know that there is a difference between obligation and right, favour and privileges, etc. and when one continually receives from a benefactor is not a justification for abuse. Such beneficiary should understand that there are other bills to be settled by the benefactor.

Infact, the only people one is obligated to collect financial support from are your parents, not even your siblings, and when your friends support you with some financial assistance, it is favour extended and a privilege you enjoy and not a right or their obligation.

Back to Igboanugo’s piece. In it he tried to compare his circumstance with that of Osimhen’s, resonating his experience with his childhood friend with whom he shared almost everything, how he helped him in his trying days and how the friend too paid him back when the side of the coin changed.

Kudos to him, he is a good man no doubt. But sir, I disagree with you on this generous gesture. Igboanuga should know that he is Igboanugo and Osimhen is Oshimhen. Both of them are of two different personalities with different values, beliefs, characters, upbringing and different focus and ambition. Besides, both circumstances are contextual.

Igboanugo’s standards of extending a helping hand to a friend are not benchmarks to judge whether someone’s actions or inactions towards childhood friends, are right or wrong, perhaps they are not universally acknowledged. Osimhem knows where it hurts him, in terms of the number of hangers-on on his pay roll, who on a daily, weekly and monthly basis solicit for financial assistance from him.. One thing we were not told is how much this dude has benefitted from Osimhen in his daily interactions, including gifts, cash, connections, etc.

It is true that as humans, our emotions can always make us think that true friendship should always be judged by pecuniary rewards. This is a fallacy. Osimhen may have gotten him connected, that we don’t know and that we should leave for history to judge.

Igboanugo’s piece also reflects the entitlement mentality that pervades our socio-economic and cultural circles. Everyone feels entitled to successful people’s wealth, even when we know such is unjustifiable. Igboanugo should know that if Osimhen continues with his generosity of taking care of hangers-on, sooner or later he will have nothing left for his future.

History is replete with super stars who because they wanted to satisfy the whims and caprices of their beneficiaries, ended up bankrupt. The world is full of executive beggars, people who don’t want to “hussle” and make a living for themselves, rather depend on the benevolence of hardworking men who daily sacrifice present comfort for their future gains.

Five thousand pounds is not a small sum to start a business in the Nigerian context. When translated into the Nigerian currency, at the present exchange rate value of two thousand Naira to a pound, it is ten million Naira.

If the childhood is prudent enough and knows how to manage funds, and maybe himself, such sum is enough to kick start his business and make him live the life of his dreams.

*Emeka Monye Is A Journalist And Works With ARISE NEWS*